It's Okay to cry...

Crying is seen as weak, when in fact it's one of the biggest releases we have have; other than an orgasm. 

So why do we link sadness with weakness? Allowing yourself to feel the pain will bring forward a river of tears. Allowing yourself to feel the pain, takes incredible strength; It doesn't take strength to bury the pain, that effectively is a weakness. Bottling feelings gets us nowhere, other than a life full of stress & worry. Basically suffering. I often hear others say " I cry all the time" -Good! Yes sometimes we do, it's life. To me this means you are leaning into the pain....of  course the crying should decrease overtime, but it shouldn't ever end. Tears will always fall - We will always miss people, be hurt by people, lose people and we'll be sad people are no longer around. When we cry, we are allowing ourselves to feel what we need to feel.  Don't criticise yourself for crying, instead... give yourself some bloody credit for leaning into the pain, sitting with it, feeling it and dealing with it. 

It is about time this stereotype comes to an end, especially in 2021 when mental and emotional health issues are prevailing; crying has a lot to do with it. There are many benefits of crying, such as; Letting go, soothing, reliving stress & pain and helping you sleep better. Crying is our body's way to not only reduce emotional stress, but also process it. When emotions are held back, such as swallowing or holding back tears, the emotional energy gets congested in the body. 

“Life damages us, every one. We can’t escape that damage. 

But now, I am also learning this: We can be mended. We mend each other.”

As kids, we're often taught to restrain our emotions. Maybe you'll remember being teased in school for crying when you were hurt. Or your parents chastising you by saying " Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about" Many of us learnt there were feelings, such as anger or resentment, that we shouldn't have or express. As children growing into adults, we gradually learn to regulate, and sometimes repress and stifle awareness of our feelings. Yet, crying is the most basic sign of humanity. 

Research shows that while most animals eyes are moistened by tears to help soothe it's eye, human beings are the only living mammal (debatable) that use their tears in response to emotion.  Research has also found that women cry 5.3 times per month and men only 1.3 times. Nevertheless, gender aside, crying shows that you are comfortable with your emotions and in fact, crying more would influence others to be more comfortable with theirs.  We are all human. We all have emotions. Being able to openly display these is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength that you feel and care about yourself & those around you. 

It's better to cry than be angry, because anger hurts others while tears flow silently through the soul and cleans the heart. Nobody deserves your tears, but whoever deserves them will not make you cry. There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power.

Crying can be symptomatic of a wider problem relating to an individuals well-being and a sign of being overwhelmed. The feeling of being overwhelmed can be a stressful experience in our human health. ACTH is a form of stress hormone, which is flushed out by crying & once released, you think a lot more rationally and whatever had been bugging you tends to seem more manageable. This is also linked to hormonal cycle for women and increases vulnerability with limited understanding as to why these heightened emotion comes forward; sometimes we just cry with no reason. However, if you find yourself a frequent crier (see what I did there LOL) with no understanding or reason behind why you are, it could be an indicator that you need to explore your feelings wider; deeper than the service. You also really need to think about how your mindset is. Crying is not reserved for just a single emotions, some of us cry when sad, others when ecstatic, some when embarrassed or hurt, and others when angry. Every emotions counts. 

Crying in response to something that makes you happy or sad is normal. It's healthy. Don't shy away from shedding tears if you feel the need to release. Just cry! So many times I have stopped myself from crying, mainly in front of people, but once I have and sat with my feelings, I have felt less stress and things suddenly felt better. If, for you crying is excessive, it  is something you should chat about with someone close to you or your  GP. And, if crying starts to interfere with your everyday life and activities, it may be a sign of depression. Along side other symptoms, such as; Feeling sad or hopeless, irritable or frustration, loss of appetite or weight loss, lack of energy, trouble sleeping or thoughts of suicide.

Please don't feel there is something wrong with you for crying or that crying is a bad process; it'd positive. it shows feeling and can be very powerful once you own it and work through how your feeling. 

“A STRONG PERSON IS NOT THE ONE WHO DOESN’T CRY. A STRONG PERSON IS THE ONE WHO CRIES AND SHED TEARS FOR A MOMENT, THEN GETS UP AND FIGHTS AGAIN.”